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Monday, April 28, 2014

A LITTLE HELP WHEN IT'S TIME FOR "THE TALK" WITH YOUR KIDS


This is most certainly primarily a decorating/DIY blog, but as a parent when I come across something I think you might like too, I love to share it!

Fifth grade is a big year in our school system.  It's the last year of Elementary School, and the year when students participate in their first "Growth and Development" class.  Our school system does a very good job in the presentation of the materials, but we definitely don't want that to be the first time that our kids are exposed to those topics.  So, ready or not, near the end of 5th grade has been the time for us to have "the talk" with our kids.

I'm not going to go into a lot of details, but I did want to share a resource that was very helpful to us.  It's a Christian-based cd/workbook program called Passport to Purity by Dennis and Barbara Rainey.  It focuses on God's plan for their lives as they strive to keep Him first and is designed to help parents in discussing love, sex, and relationships with their child as they enter adolescence.  The sessions start gently with subjects such as not "running with the herd" and addressing friends and peer pressure.  I also really like that there are separate CDs specifically for boys and girls for the sex session, so those focus specifically on things that need to be addressed for each gender.

One thing that the materials encourage is taking time for a special getaway with your child.  We chose a destination about 3 hours away...just enough time in the car with your captive audience for some open and honest discussion time.


This program includes multiple sessions, but this time we only did a few of the sessions that covered just the basics.  As our children get closer to moving into dating we will continue the rest of the sessions then.  Also, you can sort-of customize this plan into how you want to use it.  We strictly used the cds as a starting point for our discussion, listening while our child filled in blanks in their listening guide, and stopping the cd for further discussions when needed.  There are also suggested projects and activities that correlate with each session, but we didn't use those.  As parents we listened to all of the material before hand and were prepared to pick and choose what we wanted to focus on.

My husband took our son two years ago, and this past weekend, it was my turn (EEK!).  Our girls' getaway was tailored to doing some of my daughter's favorite things...she's not a shopper, although we did spend a little time choosing some new Spring outfits. We also chose a few of her favorite restaurants and treats, spent time playing mini-golf and arcade games, and enjoyed lounging at a hotel.


At the end of our getaway she received a special necklace as a memento of our weekend, and reminder of how much we love her and want her to know God's best plan for her life.



Here's a post that I came across last night as I was writing this one.  It has more info. about Passport to Purity and some great tips if you think this material might be for you.

OK, I hope that's a helpful resource for someone!  Tomorrow, back to decorating...I promise!

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Would you like to comment?

  1. This is so sweet. My son is the same age and I have been trying to talk to him. This is such a special way of approaching this.

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  2. this is such a great idea to do a getaway! my mom was always uncomfortable talking to me about this stuff (not anymore as adults- we are really close!) so i got the 5th grade lessons in school and then i was left pretty confused and i will be honest that i was very immature.... so glad that stage of life is over!

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  3. thanks for sharing this. my oldest boys are in third grade and I've started thinking about having the talk with them since they are starting to ask questions based on what they hear at school (unfortunately). and i love the necklace idea...

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    1. This resource definitely makes it a little easier to break the ice!

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  4. Such a sweet and thoughtful way to approach this. Thanks for sharing!

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  5. What a precious time for you and Emily! Passport to Purity is a wonderful resource. Now you can breath a sigh of relief that part is done :)

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  6. What a sweet approach! I really will look into this so I am ready when 5th grade comes around for us! Eeek are you ever really ready?!

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  7. I'm glad you touched on this subject Jennifer, it is indeed a delicate but also important time for kids and I can see your clearly on the right track. I should start checking it out too for our son. Thanks!

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  8. What a special and thoughtful way to go about this!

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  9. Jennifer,

    Thank you so much for sharing this post! I do not yet have children of my own, but I do actively participate in the lives of my now teenager cousins. I also teach the 8-11 year Junior Church class at church. This kind of information is always great to be able to pass along to parents and youth ministry leaders. Thanks again!

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    1. Yes! It's been around a while, but one of the best options out there I believe!

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  10. My daughter is almost 18 and we spent a Passport to Purity weekend together six years ago. It was an awesome weekend for us both and bonded us in a way I never expected. I highly recommend! Thank you for sharing your story!

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    1. I'm so glad you had a good experience with Passport to Purity too!

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  11. What a sweet idea, she is adorable! I remember when my friend did it with her daughter, they had a great time and the book was a great way to broach some topics.

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  12. That's awesome Jennifer. I have 3 girls - so I got stuck with that job all 3 times! 2 down - one to go!

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  13. Thank you so much for sharing this! I'm not quite there yet with my son but I feel the time flying by!

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  14. Thanks so much for sharing this Jennifer, I'll be checking into this as a reference in the future for sure!

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  15. I love love love that you made a special getaway out of this "event". How special for your daughter (and your son with his dad).

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  16. What a great resource ~ I so wish something like this had been available when my kids were young. My mother never explained anything, not one thing! and I never wanted my kids to "wonder" and have misinformation from their friends.

    Your daughter is adorable! She looks just like you. So happy you had a fun weekend!

    xo
    Pat
    P.S. I'm not receiving emails when you post something new...not sure why.

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  17. I think I just broke into hives. You make it sound almost easy but I am already nervous for these conversations - and my daughters are 3 and 5! My husband loves to tease me that it's all on my shoulders with two girls :)

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